envy
written 13 february 2024.
Venti idly rearranges Xiao’s bangs, his gaze soft, but still avoidant.
“I envy you,” he admits. His tone is casual, the words flowing easily, but Xiao’s gut still drops upon hearing it.
“I don’t understand,” the yaksha says. (He swallows down his own envy, thick and ugly and suffocatingly evil.)
Venti withdraws his touch and sits back, gaze now directed at the faraway blue of the sky. “You have people who choose to stay with you,” he replies, again terrifyingly plain in tone. “Your devotion draws them in. It’s hard not to have faith in a cause when watching how ardently you love.”
Venti lets out a sigh, while Xiao swallows thickly.
Venti, he sounds sick in some way… Could it be that the Abyss—
Venti finally turns to meet Xiao’s eyes.
(He’s paralyzed.)
And then, Venti reaches out. He delicately traces his fingertips over the fine, soft heart of Xiao’s cheek, slips his other hand beneath Xiao’s gloved palm to lift it closer to his face.
(Xiao’s heart pounds; every fibre of his being throbs with longing; the looming ache of karmic debt encroaching on his being.)
((So, so much of him has always been built from nothing but filthy, mortal desire.))
Venti kisses Xiao’s Vision. Xiao lets out a long, slow, shuddering breath while Venti’s jade-green eyes briefly flash miasmic pink.
“But then again,” says the god, slowly, and with an intimately intense and knowing smile. “You’ve always envied me, too, haven’t you?”
Xiao—Conquerer of Demons and the last Vigilant Yaksha—shuts his eyes.
He listens to the whispering beat of his heart.
And he gives in.